Big News Flash - Life Isn't Fair!

Life isn't fair. Every one of us knows that. It's no big secret. Sometimes, you are handed the best gifts in life and the best circumstances, and then there are lots of times when you are dealt just pure crap. Unfortunately, some people have to deal with more crap than others.

I've learned a lot of lessons this week in my wallow of self pity. As you've probably read on my blog this week, I was devastated to learn that I was not pregnant and that I would have to start a whole new TTC cycle. Big Deal! I WILL get over that. I will survive another cycle of TTC. It is not the worst thing that has ever happened to me and I can manage just fine through it. Yes, I'm jealous I'm not pregnant and others are, but I will deal with that in time.

Why the sudden change in attitude? Minutes ago I just learned that one of my good online friends has just experienced an early miscarriage. I've seen this happen to myself and so many people before, but this one just hit me so hard. This was someone that learned she was pregnant just as I was learning I was not. And I feel terrible that I was not there to support her when she learned she was pregnant, because I was so consumed with my own pity party and worrying about myself. I should have been there for her as she had those doubts and should have put my own emotions on the back burner. She probably doesn't even know all of this or think that I did anything wrong, but in my heart I did.

I really doubted that I could possibly learn or understand anything by me not getting pregnant this month. But lo and behold - there it is. I need to be a better friend, whether I like the circumstances or not. I need to lend my support wherever I can. Life isn't all about ME. I need to think about myself, but then also of the others who are in my life.

Jenn, I'm thinking about you and my heart broke a little bit more for you today. You are in my prayers.